I can’t believe that this is my FOURTH year writing one of these! And I also can’t believe that 2018 is coming to a close… what a freakin’ roller coaster it was. I started the year off strong - felt really confident for a couple months (wrote a 26 page outline for a book I started to write.. reconnected with some old friends), and then lost steam (again). I went on my first creative retreat (in Montana) and it was really expensive (lol). For the months following that, I questioned whether it was “worth it” and tried to digest all of the feedback I had received on my work. Going into it - I think I was already searching for “what was next” in my life / career. I felt like I had hit a wall again - really uncertain just about everything.. I took a leap of faith by applying to the retreat, and when I got accepted - I jumped into it hoping it would give me fresh insight and some direction… but I think I left feeling unsure what to make of it all (although it was a beautiful place to visit).

I spent the second third of this year in pretty much complete (self inflicted) isolation. May thru August, I didn’t hang out with a single person outside of my immediate family. The immediate family I DID see or spend time around - I felt completely withdrawn from. I dreaded being around people of any kind, and was shutting out even my closest friends. I was falling asleep on the couch watching TV shows I didn’t even really like, and generally speaking… lost my desire to get out of bed in the morning. Creatively, I felt really depleted - the desire and motivation just wasn’t there. I spent a lot of time walking miles and miles of beaches by myself (moody, I know 😂). It was a rough few months where I felt really far from being my best self, to say the least…

The final third of this year has been a surprisingly reinvigorating few months. I feel like I’ve found the basis for the thesis project that I wish I had 4.5-5 years ago - the basis for a LIFE’S work (which is a REALLY bold thing to say, I realize) - but I really do feel that way. I started collecting beach trash at the end of August (after walking miles of coastline in the summer… it became impossible to continue to ignore). This then led to organizing / cohosting my first group beach clean up and the launch of some new products for my Etsy shop (beach plastic holiday greeting cards)! I haven’t felt this excited, passionate, and deeply ROOTED about anything I’ve made in well… maybe ever. In 2019, I plan to continue to grow the greeting card line, cohost more beach clean ups, and continue the important conversation about sustainability through my creative work. It’s gonna be a good year - I can feel it! But first, here’s a little recap of 2018: